Today I am 25 years old. Strange. It’s strange how the things that were important to my 5 or 10 years ago mean almost nothing to me now. I remember when I was 15 the only thing I cared about was earning a starting spot on the high school football team. When I was 20 I could barely afford to put gas in my car, but I was having the time of my life in college learning new things and drinking cheap liquor. Life is an evolution I suppose.
My focus has changed over time, but at my core I think I’m still the same person. I can’t place what it is that makes me – me – but I know it’s there. There is still that same voice in my head talking things through, the way I operate is still the same, the way I solve problems and get through the day – all the same. I like that, it almost feels nostalgic. Like, “Hey there old friend, hello me.”
I remember growing up at home things were tough. When things became unbearable I used to say to myself “I wonder what things will be like in 5 years?” Then I would imagine – Maybe it would be a Tuesday, I would be in school with friends, things would be good. I guess it was my own version of “things always get better with time” or “nothing lasts forever”.
There’s a lot more certainty now, but it’s still strange asking myself that same question – I’ll be 30 – I might even have a kid. A son or daughter begging me for attention. I might live in another country writing on this little blog about the mountains of Guatemala while sipping a cup of coffee. I like that.
Time passes so quickly, but when I think in detail of every instance of life I have lived over these past 25 years it’s almost overwhelming how much can happen. Best friends come and go, your goals change, responsibilities come and go, everything changes, nothing changes. Life is a funny thing like that. I still have t-shirts from middle school, but some of my best friends from high school and college I dont’ know anymore. Seems strange. I guess many things in life are a function of convenience as much as they are importance.
But here I am. Drinking a cup of freshly ground Guatemalan coffee I bought a few months ago in Antigua. In my office, my quiet sanctuary inside my own home, taking the day off for no particular reason at all. Life is good.